Most of the time, I suppress the negative side of me- the anger, jealousy, stubbornness, etc. etc.
Suppress them from coming into public view, that is.
Those close to me will definitely have atleast a glimpse of it, and maybe coz of it they are close to me.
All the years I've thought that being a "good" girl is a admirable goal.
But that goal has been so tiresome and depressing.
Its such a burden to be labelled a good person and look within myself to see all those negative traits.
Thanks to the books i've read and people i've met, i've come to realise that the so-called negative things are not so bad after all.
I can still feel them... I can see them but knowing that i can the control them (uhm, sometimes) is so self-satisfying, that am kind of proud to be myself.
I just keep one thing in mind.
Its tough to label myself as good and then notice and suppress the faults in me.
Instead, I see myself as bad and notice and be proud of the good in me :)
Twisted thinking, but works for me.
Kind of Glass half empty/full theory.
And the ultimate goal is not to be good or bad.. but to be myself.. the authentic ME. Right?
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